Family Matters

The adoption journey for us has been a crazy one to say the least.  When we got Lily back in August 30, 2016, I thought most of the difficult journey was over.  In reality it separated our family from being complete for nearly six months.  Whether it was myself working in Canada to sustain my status with the school board, Mandy visiting family and sponsors, Max studying in high school, Gabe and Mercedes travelling to and from Guatemala with mom or dad, or running fundraising events each time Mandy or myself would have to stay in Guatemala with Lily while the other travelled.  This fragmentation of our family was premature.  Despite the discomfort created, God used this opportunity to shape us a bit as we were put to the fire yet again.

We are now entering the next set of battles that need to be conquered: the jostling of sibling position; living as a biracial family in an almost pure latino environment; eliminating contact between Lily and the orphanage as she establishes our family as being home; gathering all legal documents to apply for a Canadian visa; and living as a family unit that has jumped into having a family member being in the toddler stage.  Regardless of all of life's challenges we know as a family that we are doing this together.  Breaking up the troops is not an option, at least until the time is right to deploy one from the platoon for their next set of battles into adulthood.  We give praise daily for our family and what lies on the road ahead.  To God be the glory, for the great things He has done and still is doing.

It was never intended to be this way.

I studied biology in university and learned of how we have natural cycles of various sizes.  One example is oxygen and glucose entering the cell and activating a cyclical chemical reaction that produces carbon dioxide, which in turn is taken by plants to produce glucose and oxygen.  Or, how we consume food and eliminate the remainder which in turn returns to the earth to bring nutrient once again to grow more food.  These are just two of a slue of other natural cycles that exist, but they show how our understanding of life is: be what you are-> change into something else -> cycle back to the original.

To say that God didn't intend death to occur would be difficult for me to accept because He made so many beautiful systems and cycles to take care of all of what is needed to be recycled.  However, God did set us aside from all of His creation as something unique that could be in eternal relationship with Him.  We were given a special pass from the rest to become supernatural beings with a soul.  My brain rattles a bit around these questions: 'If we were built to live forever, were we even a living biological being or just a spirit in physical form?  Was God in the same form as Adam and Eve when walking in the Garden of the Eden?  Did this change once sin came in the world and we anchored our soul to a now mortal physical form?  Am I just a little nuts and only ponder about this after gluing my kids project together?'

Regardless of all of these thoughts, it is important to realize that we were made different and do live for eternity in a spiritual realm.  It is also important to note that sin separated us from God and that to have eternal life with Him only comes when we accept Him as our saviour and Lord over our lives.  Our experience with death is complicated.  As Christians we admit to an afterlife but do we believe in it?  And if you do believe in it,  how might you live differently knowing that this here is the short run?  Why is it so painful to experience the death of a loved one when you know they are in eternal paradise?

Shortly after the death of my Grandma Wilson we attended
a funeral of my friend's grandmother.  It was a good time to
mourn both their deaths as I wept in the graveyard of Jalapa
with the multitude of others that were equally pained with
the result that sin produces.

Personally I have experienced the death of both of my grandmothers while working here in Guatemala.  On both occasions I was relieved to know that my grandmothers were right with Christ and that they are blessed to be living an amazing life in glory.  However, this never lifted the burden of my sorrow that they are now separated from me.  Maybe I'm selfish, but I loved having my grandmothers here, learning about our family origins, and bonding with someone that really cared for me and my interests too.  I know I'm not unique with this feeling.  Even Jesus Himself cried in anger at the death of His friend.  I remember our pastor in Canada speaking that even though Jesus had the power to raise the dead He still wept because we were not intended to exist this way.  That when sin entered the world we created a divide between us and God.  Thankfully for Christ He bridged that gap for us and we can be in relationship with Him again.

I urge readers of this blog to seek out a relationship with God and carry out a life with Him.  If you need help in what to do next, please don't hesitate to message Mandy or myself, or contact a local church and get connected.  If hell is the complete separation of us from God, we unfortunately get a small taste of it when someone dies.  I know my grandmothers are in a better place.  I will continue to strive to live for Christ and someday I will get to see my grandparents and other loved ones that continue to follow Christ.  But until then, I am left with the reminder that sin isolates us and breaks up the original intended plan God had for our lives.

Not Understanding Your Impact

Over the last few years Mandy and I have had the awesome opportunity to share our journey and mission life with a variety of visitors.  These people walk away from Jalapa with a changed heart and perspective that they could not get through a TV screen, a mission conference, a conversation with us about Guatemala, or even a blog post.  We were created to be relational and to be the body of the church working together to solve the world's problems.  Without these visitors making contact here in Guatemala, it would take great faith and empathy to begin to sympathize with the issues and understand the struggle.  It is not to say that we don't care about the issues of others when we do not go directly to aid with their strife, however we can not be the most effective relational support from a distance.  Sharing burdens with others invites them into a more intimate relationship, exactly like God calls us to cast our burdens onto Him so we can be intimate in our relationship with Him.

In the past few months I have seen some men have the opportunity to blessing and carry the burden of others.  One gentleman came a few weeks back and he shared that he was quite well travelled based on his work as a pilot.  Landing in various parts of the world and staying for brief periods of time didn't always allow for a thorough look at what life entailed.  Despite the exposure to various landscapes and obvious differences in demographics from country to country, there was little opportunity to truly get connected with others.  During his trip to Shadow of His Wings Orphanage (show.org) he had the opportunity to share and sympathize in the life of the abused, neglected, abandoned and orphaned children and women of Monjas, Guatemala.  His kind and generous heart was broken from what he saw.  He had a difficult time articulating the change he felt, but I best believe he could have described it as God broke his heart to make room for a renewed one that was growing.  Did these people do anything special for him? In short, no.  They were just willing to share their life with someone.  Their impact on his life was huge and now he has made it a mission to seek sponsorship for the children at SOHWO.  Those kids don't know the impact that they make but they do make one for the glory of God by being in relationship with others.

Another person I would like to share about is a former neighbour of mine.  We were blessed to have him and his family to come and visit us this past summer.  He is well travelled visiting various countries in various stages of development and has been exposed to different cultural practices.  During his visit, he saw more of the business end of what I deal with in Jalapa.  In those few days he heard stories from others about theft, extortion, corruption, limited access to resources, limited financial gains, and other social complexities that limit construction and businesses.  For the most part,  I thought he took most of it in stride and was underwhelmed based on his travels.  However, upon return to Canada it became obvious to me that he wrestled hard with what he saw.  Despite seeing and talking to people in different factories around the world, he really hadn't experienced their personal lives outside of work or discussed business issues on a tiny scale like he had with my business partner Leonel.  Time and time when we met back in Canada he discussed the hardships people go through and that making gains in developing countries meets lots of opposition.  The impact of what he saw and becoming more  relational with the people of Guatemala,  pushed him to speak to others about the difficulties people have in the developing world and to think about what can be done to help.   Leonel sharing his life experiences to my old neighbour brought about change.  I'm sure if you were to ask Leonel if he was trying to create an impression,  his answer would would be the same as in the previous story.

Regardless of what our thoughts are about our lives and how we perceive whether we make an impact or not is somewhat irrelevant.  Being who God intended you to be and caring enough to share your life with others does make an impact.  Mandy and I feel at times stuck and not able to see the purpose but sometimes we are fortunate enough to get reminders that others are moved by the direction we have taken.  I encourage all readers to go out and connect with people and tell those who have inspired change in your life that they have moved you.  With that being said, I want to thank all of our readers, and responders to our blog.  Your comments and willingness to partake in our lives spurs us to carry on like a marathon runner limping towards the finish line whose spirits are lifted by the cheers of the supporters along the route.

The dark night closed in.  My body ached with every twist and turn to find comfort.  The intense aroma of my essential oils spilled out of my diffuser throughout my room, but I didn't even notice.  I couldn't breathe, I couldn't swallow, I couldn't move and now I couldn't sleep.  After all, this was day three in bed.  I noticed the emptiness beside me.  Usually the sound of the rise and fall of his chest is comforting, the warmth from his body close.  Only cold sheets, as I stretched my foot across the bed.  It was 1:30 am and I crept down the stair case.  A warm glow came from beneath the office door and I knew this was a late night project for him.  A project, a short commercial if you will, a promotional tool for an upcoming  'Orphan Sunday'.  The very thought of this was never God's design.  Why should children be abandoned, neglected and abused?  And over and over my mantra remains, ' God break my heart for that which breaks yours'.

Our journey of fostering has taught me more of the character of Christ.  To love unconditionally, to walk along side and invest in relationship even if it means I am at risk of being lied too and disrespected.  To give a out of a place with a return of no expectations.  To love and and not be loved at times.  Where did we go wrong?   We sat many times explaining the importance of a marriage, a Godly man that would love and respect the way Jesus intends.  An adult trapped in a child's body, our oldest of the four sisters is pregnant.  All eyes would be looking to see how we would handle this.  A life of abuse and orphan care,  transitioned into a family that sets standards and accountability.  That loves no matter what.  Because that is who we are .. family.

 If only she could see it.  Following the exact footsteps of family history.  The sin that entangles and chokes out anything that is pure.  Generation after generation. Proverbs 26:11 says ' As a dog returns to it's vomit, so a fool repeats his foolishness'  I can't tell you how many times I have returned to the sin that so easily entangles, but there is hope, and there is freedom, when we have it in Jesus.  He can break any stronghold and set any captive free.

I have learned that blood is thicker than water and the return to biological mom was what she wanted.  And we stay true to our word, and our love.  Just like the father received his son after he left for some time, God is always ready and waiting to embrace us when we are ready.  And we keep allowing our faith to be stretched and our hearts hurt.  Because He is love and we love him.

We stand in need of prayer and wisdom.  Join us, would you?

Finding Peace

Good looking bunch of guys ready to be stretched by God.

Yesterday I went out with a group from Langley, BC to drop off food baskets to widows and the elderly who cannot provide enough sustenance for themselves and their families.  We drove through the streets of Monjas searching for adobe huts and corrugated steel shanties mixed amongst new building developments.  The contrast of those who have and those who don't couldn't be more apparent.

We crouched into a home that was only tall enough for the people inside.  Others were ample in interior space but were as dark as night inside with a veil of smoke lingering in the air due to a lack of windows and ventilation.  The only light that entered inside was the opening of the rickety door or a single light bulb shining through a sooty cob webbed film in the centre of the room.  Where the light managed to touch these people's home, unveiled a hard life where scavenging and improvised use of materials is a necessity to survive.  Our group of Canadians entered each place in a sober manner.  All of us stood quiet listening to the translator but I'm not sure how much was being absorbed. It wasn't that we were exhausted or insensitive, but we couldn't help but feel the burden being put on our shoulders like a lead apron as we entered these places. Thoughts race through my mind like: 'How is this possible?' 'TV telethons have not done this justice.' 'God where is the church supporting these people?' 'I have been abundantly blessed.' 'I feel dirty being here.' 'How do these people stay safe?'

One house in particular stood out for me from the rest.  As we pulled up to the adobe home a tiny elderly woman that looked like she was in her 90s but was actually in her 70s gave us a weathered leathery grin and held out her droopy wrinkled arms to embrace our leader.  After we huddled into her home, she positioned us in front of her 50 year old daughter's bed.  While we stood there the sheets began to rustle and her daughter began to emerge from below.  To our shock her daughter was half naked and exposed to all of us in the room.  With a complete disregard to our presence, the exposed daughter tugged at the bottom of her mom's apron.  Feelings of discomfort were easily seen on the faces across the room as the mother in a loving frustration grabbed a shirt and dressed her naked adult child.  We now had learned that her daughter was born with a severe mental disability and would never achieve independence from the home.  Upon turning around from dressing her girl she thanked us for bringing food and supplies because it is hard to make a living when she is constantly taking care of her daughter.  She continued on to say that she wanted God to take her child from her before she dies.  The thought of her dying before her daughter is too painful to bare knowing that there isn't anyone to take care of her precious daughter.

Just an example of what conditions people live in while being
surrounded by new housing development.

I don't know what everyone else was thinking, but I was mad, frustrated, and crushed.  This woman's biggest prayer request was to have peace through the painful loss of a child.  If anyone deserved to have peace it was this woman and the sacrificial hell that she has lived to make ends meet for her and her daughter for fifty plus years.  But that was what crushed me, she deserved a better life.  She could have walked away from the responsibility of her daughter and received no consequence in this corrupt nation, but she didn't because she dutifully served her daughter out of her reverence to God and His provision.  I truly believe that she knows we are not worthy of God's grace and that she is thankful to her Creator which is why she still found joy even in her circumstance.  The idea of deserving something probably doesn't exist for her as she seeks contentment in the little she does have.

We prayed for her and left her home keeping the weight of the burden as to what we saw.  The group from Canada was obviously shaken up.  Pausing outside of the door I teared up and became laboured in my breathing.  I had only shared about 10 minutes of my life with this woman but I was in turmoil from seeing the broken pieces of her life and the glory from God she was reflecting.  At times I stress over all sorts of tiny things, and here was this woman praising God for His abundant provision.  To be honest, I actually held a sort of envy for what this woman had.  She received something that many of us probably never will get to know, which is a peace that surpasses understanding (Philippians 4:6,7).

It is hard walking away from situations like that and not feeling defeated.  I have no doubt that everyone in our group wanted to fix her problem, but the reality is we already have been given our due share to manage and our best was to love, pray and offer a bit of aid in a moment of obvious need.  The act of compassion gives us the opportunity to be in communion with their pain and respond in a way to support their misfortunes. What my family and I experience and see on a day to day basis is something we want to share with others.  To have the opportunity to gain a different perspective where people can find peace in dire circumstance is life changing.  To be compassionate to people struggling to survive and seeing them find the peace that God provides is truly one of the most humbling experiences a person can go through.  My hope for all of you is to experience and see God's peace and light in those dark places.

Peace,

Matt

Do you ever wonder if you are doing the right thing?

Mercedes teaching the toddlers
at the safe house a new game.

When we first got started on this whole missionary life back in 2009, we have often struggled with where we need to be.  So many opportunities come our way each day, many of which are small with no lasting impact but on the rare occasion we face big ones.  For Mandy and I, coming to Guatemala was a three year process in which we fought about where our purpose was in God's plan for us and our children.  Through lots of prayer and discernment, we feel that we are supposed to be here and working with these awesome yet unwanted children.

 I personally struggle  playing my own devil's advocate.  Unquestionably, I feel that working in Guatemala is our calling but what that work entails is not always so clear.  Many days I pray to be productive or to find the right combination of 'works' to 'relationship'.  What provides a better eternal impact?  Giving to those in need? Being with those in need? Both?

Taking on five girls full time in our home has
presented some challenges (to say the least).

How does someone wade through all of the problems in the world and find one that they need to "fix" when so many problems are presented?  For example, the children at the safe house need decent food, shelter, water, and a spiritual education.  All of which we have been providing.  However, some are learning English in school and need some support, babies need to be given more attention, some kids have speech therapy appointments, others want to learn how to craft, all of them need to get exercise and time out of the house, they need spiritual mentors, etc.  Realistically I know we can't be all things to all people.  Mandy and I are pulled in different directions to do what is 'best' for our family.  Admittedly, we have made many mistakes and have questioned ourselves in the decision making process.

My parents with Gabe and Mercedes ready
to do some trick or treating.

To answer the blog title, I do not always think we are doing the right thing, but we do strive to do the best at what we can.  I remember a conversation with my parents a couple years back while we were getting ready to go out for Halloween.  Mom and Dad made a decision when I was about nine years old to stop going out for Halloween.  Talk about torture, watching your friends enjoy the evening of collecting candy while we went to the mall to avoid the costumed kids knocking at our door.  However, 24 years later my parents got dressed up at my house with my kids and went out to enjoy the evening of collecting treats.  During that night, I jabbed at my parents that they had denied me a right of passage as a kid and here they are celebrating the holiday with my own.  To which my Dad replied quickly and confidently that they were wrong and at times parents make mistakes.  Nothing more than that.  For me, my Dad demonstrated a lot of grace.  He was not going beat himself up but stated where his decision wasn't the best and moved on.

I am thankful for the example my parents provided for me.  With the various projects that we have completed here and the people that we have interacted with, we struggle to always see the benefit we hope to create.  Where we need to be gracious with ourselves,  is that our hearts are always in the best interest of those we work with.  Continue to pray for us and those we work with as we desire to make positive and eternal change by doing the right thing.

Dropping Nets

18 As Jesus was walking beside the Sea of Galilee, he saw two brothers, Simon called Peter and his brother Andrew. They were casting a net into the lake, for they were fishermen. 19 “Come, follow me,” Jesus said, “and I will send you out to fish for people.” 20 At once they left their nets and followed him. (Matt 4:18-20)

This is a story of faith, hope and love.  A story to tell and share.  It is our story             of what God is doing in our lives.  

baby Susan at church with Matt

Five weeks ago, I sat alone on my empty bedroom floor, quietly with God.  It felt strangely foreign in the empty house.  The familiar smell of cookies in the oven, the pitter patter of feet up and down the stairs, and the sounds of laughter, somehow faded as the house emptied.  They are few of the many wonderful memories we had in our home.  Understanding obedience has often left me in wonder and anticipation.  I have struggled with fear, anxiety and sometimes doubt.  Reluctantly, I have had to let go of things and have learned to experience surrender on a new level.  It came with a fight and great turmoil.  I was reminded through that process that God has blessed us with so much and it is His to take.  Every now and then I have an instantaneous moment of panic, and I ask myself..."what the heck have we done?"  I have been avoiding sitting and writing for some time now.  The thought of trying to articulate and express my emotions is somewhat daunting.  I fear if I stop to write I might actually have to deal with some buried emotions. 

midnight feeding

I left a piece of my heart behind saying goodbye to family and friends.  The impact this has had on our kids thus far has been nothing shy of smooth.  I have had the most incredible heart to heart talks with our ten year old son in the last 8 months in preparation for this transition.  Out of all our kids, this by far has been the hardest on Gabe.  He has questioned faith and whether God really exists.  Of course as parents, we want to shelter our kids, protect them and avoid discomfort.  I have learned to let go and let God do only what He can do in Gabe's life.  I realized that his faith journey is not a result of what I do for him in his life. It is something he needs to grasp, something he needs to pursue and own one day.  I have had the privilege of seeing God work in Gabe's heart and every time he opens up, he melts my heart.  We have sat together and cried over the injustices we have been exposed to.  

medical team

Upon arriving, we had a medical team here from various cities across the states.  Max had the opportunity to head into the mountain village to help with the clinic.  David (our partner in Hands Of Mercy) meets with local Guatemalans beforehand,who know the communities in need to distribute numbers to the local village leaders who then pass the numbers on to the people in need. Max took patients blood pressure, seated them, and helped slit pills while connecting with the kids.  We are looking forward to another team of physician assistants coming the second week in December.  We also quickly reconnected with our four girls at Casa Hogar, Los Pinos.  It was a joy to be a part of Angelica's graduation last week.  As part of the ceremony, the parent has the honour of presenting the diploma.  She called her dad (Matt) up.  It was so incredible to be there in support for her. Currently, I am a full time care giver of a 2 and a 1/2 month old baby girl.  She is so precious!  Little Susan was brought to our safe house after being found in a box in the street.  I don't know her full story nor expect to, but I know one thing for sure; God has blessed us with her for now.  As I hold her tight and feed her in the night  I pray for her tiny life.  I know that God has something special in store for her.  I pray for the mom she may never know. I can't imagine what it meant for her to give up her child.  Somedays I feel like I want to be building things and getting my hands dirty instead of changing dirty diapers and night feedings. There is more of a sense of accomplishment in a project.  But God wants us to invest in people not buildings, and as messy and hard as it is at times, I know I am exactly where I am supposed to be.  

We are in the process of writing proposals and board meetings for Hands of Mercy.  We are hoping to purchase land to provide a place for the kids to grow up in foster home situations. We want to provide a more integrated approach with solar energy, farming, educational programs, and a medical clinic.  We are dreaming big!  

I have been reading  a section on boldness in Altar Ego ( Craig Groeschell) Just this past January I prayed boldly that God would speak into our lives, regarding His will and purpose for us.  I have learned that bold obedience often triggers opposition.  I have faced lots over the last few months.  There is a part of me that hesitates in asking boldly for God to provide because I know that opposition will follow.  But when we are in the centre of His perfect will for our lives, I believe that God will reveal His plan and that if we are willing to drop our nets and follow Him, our faith grows and we get to see His holy spirit at work! 

An Amazing Start

     Many of you are aware that I am (was) a school teacher and that I was working with the great staff and student body at Grapeview Public School.  Like any job, you connect with fellow staff and students by discussing your comings and goings to have a better sense of each other.  As the year progressed, many coworkers were intrigued with the work our family had done in Guatemala last year and they asked more about our journey.  It's flattering when  someone takes an interest in what you do.  Little did I know that after my  announcement to return to Guatemala, the school would start scheming ways to help.

Freezie sales for mission support.

     During the last month of school a group of girls in grades 4 and 5 devised a plan to use duct tape and fold it into all sorts of crazy assortments to make pencil flowers, hair bows, wallets, purses, and other items.  They sold these items around the school and directed all funds to the mission in Guatemala.  Additionally, two teachers started to sell freezies at school with their class and social justice club to direct all funds to the needs of the orphanage.  Another teacher  formed a drum group and performed at the local Home Hardware raising both awareness and financial support for the  mission.  I was blown away by all the support and that a group of people were sympathetic toward the same cause.

     The following week we had an assembly for volunteers that support our school community.  During the assembly they called me up and were making mention of the work my family and I have done and will be doing.  I prayed that God would give me the right words to say to the young audience as I can't go into the details about the harsh realities many children around the world experience and why they need so much help.  After I delivered a short speech (which I honestly thank God for because I am far from being that articulate!) the staff announced how much was raised and estimated how much more may be raised.  A large cheque of $2300 was unrolled.  My lower lip started to quiver and then the staff did something even more incredible.  They said  that more was being done.  A lump in my throat formed. Two retiring teachers  this year,  gave up their retirement gifts and directed the monies to the mission. As if that wasn't enough,  another teacher stated that the school had drafted a letter in honour of these retiring teachers that a donation from the Grapeview community could be made to our mission.  Tears filled my eyes.

Bucket Drumming at Home Hardware

     After dropping these bombs of amazing support they then asked me to pose with students and the cheque for a photo op.  I mustered up the words 'thank you' and 'wow' before I quickly turned away from the crowd and looked at my supportive staff and students and began to sob.  Crying is not a common event for me but has become more a part of how I express myself when God breaks me.  God broke me at that moment as I saw how much capacity of love exists in my school community.  I hugged each staff and student down the line that stood behind me not only during that presentation but in support for the work that was going to happen in Guatemala.  It is a rare moment to feel that loved by so many people at once and know that they too mourn over the unmet needs of others that we care deeply about.

     Needless to say the outpouring of support at Grapeview was an amazing start as we continue to find people to partner with us in the mission.  We pray that our support letters find you well and that you can be a part of a ministry.

Jeremiah 29:11

Alternative Realities

My 'coworkers' for the morning shovelling stone to
be used in the cement foundation of the new storage house.

The past couple of weeks have been crazy here in Jalapa.  However through the fog of all of the work and activity a few moments stood out.
This past Friday I went to Casa Hogar to help with collecting river rocks for the new driveway and to buy some school supplies for some of the girls.  However plans changed (surprise surprise) and I ended up having to haul loads of sand, stone and cinder block to the construction site of the new storage house that is being funded by a group from Spain.  I was partnered with two boys as my helpers for the morning.  After a bit of grunt labour, conversation started to pick up and I found out that the boys were 14 years old and had been working in construction full-time for the last two years.
When I asked about school, they stated that they complete weekend courses to keep up with their peers.  Looking at these two boys, who are a bit smaller than the average 14 year old boy in Canada,  I was amazed.  From our experience here boys don't work like this unless they need to support their family.  It was difficult for me to comprehend how at the age of 12 they stopped living like a 'normal' child and took on more of a role of a man.
These experiences make it hard for me to return to the comforts of Canada because this kind of story is exactly what it is 'foreign'.  It is not to say that these boys were pathetic in appearance, malnourished, being abused, or not receiving an education.  It just seems far from fair when we compare the standards and expectations for our children in North America to those children who live 2000 kilometres south of us.
I don't think that a child working a job is bad thing (depending on the duration and type of labour).  However, when the expectation is to be the provider for your family and forego elements of your youth to earn less than $7 a day, this is a reality I will try to but never understand.

This picture does no justice but while driving by with my young
co-workers I snapped off a photo of Eddie's house while some of
the women from the community lingered from the new cooking lesson.

The other moment was watching a group of women from Los Pinos collect at Eddie's house to learn how to prepare different foods that are more nutritious for their children.  Once a month this so called gourmet group collects at a different home in Los Pinos where the woman of the house instructs the others on how to cook the new meal or snack.  Food resources are limited, you have to bring your own plate or bag to carry out the new creation, it has to be cooked over an open flame or wood stove, and since many of the women in the village are at the party you bring your kids as well.  Great to see the community connect this way and have the opportunity to be creative with one-another.  Reminded me of my wife's gourmet group back in Canada, but this focussed on the practical production of nutritious foods at a low cost for children.

Where's your security?

Jay and I at Casa Hogar (truck in background)

This past Sunday was a very different experience.  After dropping off a former student of mine at the airport we accepted a new Canadian volunteer named 'Jay'.  He has been travelling through Central America with his camera and video equipment taking in the culture and entrenching himself in the happenings of different missions.  On our way back home to Jalapa we exchanged stories and I primarily focused on the frustrations of how Casa Hogar needs a better maintenance plan.  Embarrassingly enough the truck broke down on the side of the mountain highway due to a loose battery terminal, a dirty rad and limited supply of oil in the engine.  I'm sure the thought rolling through his mind right away was "And you are helping them with maintenance?"

The truck is such an important tool here
to deliver supplies, carry people, and
to drive over the rough terrain.

We began to wiggle wires, check fluids and attempted to restart vehicle after each adjustment to only end in the same disfunction.  I reassured him the truck has been nothing but a maintenance nightmare as I quickly called my friend and new employee Arnold to get us out of the bind.  As we waited at the side of the road many of my fears of bandits that I had in my first visits here came through my head.  Knowing that we were going to have to wait this out until help came I prayed quickly that we could get the truck going and relax in the safety of our home.
 Only waiting a quick moment a man in another black Toyota pick-up in the same model as mine stopped and got out of his truck and offered help.....and in English to boot.  He told us that he was at his home when a few people in a passing bus yelled out to him that some people need help with their truck around the corner.  He quickly wiggled the same wires we had, checked the fluids again and proceeded to sit in the driver's seat and started the truck.

Might as well snap a photo while waiting on the road.

I wish I could have seen my face when the car started because it just didn't make sense.  The man stepped out of my truck, shook hands, walked towards his truck and went on his way. I called Arnold to stop him from coming to save us in the mountains and we went home.
 Often the fears we carry are real and can be justified, however God used that small instance to show me that He is always present and that we only need to lean on Him for our security.  I often laugh at how I try to accomplish or control things on my own and how God can quickly turn those events on my head.
To carry the story further, as soon as Jay and I got home Arnold (without prompting or indication) pulled in behind us immediately with the tools to fix the problem.  Arnold also showed us that a little lemon juice and baking soda can clean the corrosion off of terminals in a pinch......got to love the ingenuity of Guatemalans.  When God provides He does so in ways that you can't imagine.
Needless to say the truck has been running much better and we are truly thankful for the provision of safety, aid and friendship as we continue on with our mission.
Praise God.

What hasn't been said....

It was funny the other day when I received a Facebook message implying that they would like to hear my (Matt's) perception, so here it is.  I guess for me it is refreshing to read Mandy's heart and mind as it spills on the web.  Often one can be extremely intimate with someone and never understand or completely perceive what they see and how it is effecting their life experience.  It seems strange that a computer can be used as a tool to get to know your soulmate better.  However I give this credit to God as I can't begin to explain how He uses the things and experiences in our lives to find a deeper sense of our being and relation to one another.

An example of this is our camera.  Before we came down I asked Mandy to purchase a camera that could be dropped, frozen, immersed in water and go through dust storms unharmed.  The purpose of these qualities had less to do with the climate of Guatemala and more to do with the expected punishment my children and the girls at Casa Hogar would inflict on it.  Sure enough these attributes were worth having when we recently went to the town of Monjas (pronounced: Moan-hahs) three and a half weeks ago.

In Monjas there is a series of spring fed of pools in which we took the girls swimming for the afternoon.  At first there was an awkwardness in being at the pools due to the girls lacking the resources of a bathing suit (bra, t-shirt and shorts were used instead), and even more so by the presence of many teenage boys swimming and looking at the new girls in town.  Knowing that swimming was a special treat Mandy and I were a bit surprised that they did not embrace the chance immediately to get in the water.  This didn't inhibit Max, Gabe and Mercedes to say the least as they stripped down and were in the water before we knew it.

As time passed the girls began to come out of their shells and began to splash in the water, which lead to water fights and finally to jumping into the water.  In watching this progression we were able to get involved in the action with our camera.  The girls watched in shock as hopped into the mayhem with camera in hand.  However as soon as I immersed the camera and asked for their photo, any girl that had reservations about being underwater quickly got over it.  The only eyes they seemed to notice now were not of the boys but of the camera.  It was fun watching the girls become more creative with their poses and groupings, as well as, getting over their anxieties of being under the water.  We were even fortunate to capture Gabby getting over her fears of swimming and jumping off of the diving board to Mandy and I as we treaded below.  This small capability within the camera inspired girls to coordinate for photos, encourage each other to get over a fear, communicate with us more and to express themselves in a new way.  This was an unexpected use when we thought of the purchase but was a great tool to help us experience that day.

Enjoying ice cream after swimming.

Another great development in the last month has been my new relationship with two groups that support Casa Hogar.  The one group is named EMAUS and are based out of Guatemala City.  It is comprised of business professionals, engineers, and contractors, all of which are Guatemalan, that desire to volunteer their professional advice and resources to aid in the management of Casa Hogar.  The other is the HEAR Foundation out of the Chicago area in the United States.  This group is a small organization of a few employees that aggressively fund raises and supports Casa Hogar, in addition to completing building projects at the girls home.  Even though we may have communication barriers and great distances separating us from each other, the use of cell phones and computer translation has brought our ideas, hopes, plans, and hearts to a common understanding.

As it stands, HEAR, EMAUS and the Wilson's are coming together to create a plan to generate a single organized plan for Casa Hogar that will be the guide and structure to not only our efforts but to the many other groups that support Casa Hogar as well.  The goal is to unite through a website, in English and Spanish, to be transparent about what we see as needs and what we are united in developing together.  Our immediate plans that we are codeveloping is renovations to the kitchen and replacing the driveway that causes tremendous problems in the rainy season.

Me with EMAUS, Mother Claudia, Mother Rutilia,
the Agricultural Minister of Jalapa (in yellow),
and HEAR (the cell phone on the table)

 It has been an exciting time here seeing how God has pulled so many people together for a common cause and making great relationships with those who desire more for people that have been neglected.  Going through the process of "doing missions" has gave me insight that it is not the actions of one person that makes things great but the influence of a great team that sacrifices together.  I'm sure as Martin Luther King Jr. and Ghandi brought about change in the USA and India it had little to do with their single action but the willingness of the many to believe and stand together to make that change.





Here is a great video that sums up the blog! 

Faithfulness

This past month has been a roller coaster of emotion, and I feel exhausted.  We had a busy holiday, visiting local friends, hanging out at the orphanage and having meetings on end to plan out this next school year.   Matt has been busy meeting with other organizations co-ordinating a plan for the facility.  After visiting three local schools, we narrowed it down to a private spanish school located about 4km outside Jalapa.  The kids will be bussed in at 7am and will be dropped off in front of our house at 1pm.  The only downfall of this school is that it is JK-GR 4.  We talked with Max about this and he struggled with the idea of going into grade 4 again.  We felt that this school had the best education and programming, and we explained to Max that it was really important for him to learn the language and we would focus on grade 5 math and english at home.  After taking a trip to all the schools with the kids, he agreed with our decision. The kids are starting school on Monday and are a little nervous. If you think of them please pray for this difficult transition.

getting a little silly at "House and Green"

As the kids are transitioning into a new schedule, so are Matt and I.  We will be spending more time working at Casa Hogar.  I am running three afternoon programs with the nuns, and three morning classes teaching hairstyling to the girls.  Aside from working at Casa Hogar, I am currently working on translating some curriculum for running a weekly bible study at the women's prison.  Matt will be running a tutoring program as well as meeting with the head nun regarding budgeting and planning.

We have been in touch with a group from Guatemala city, who have been bringing aid to Casa Hogar by means of food and other consumables.  With their expertise and knowledge, they are helping us research the best quality paint for the renovations we will be making on the kitchen.  Mother Claudia created a wish list for items so Matt and I spent some time researching good quality, industrial kitchen ware, in Guatemala city.

A few short weeks ago we said goodbye to our dear friend Kait.  Little did we know the adventure she would be on, upon arriving home.  God was up to something....big!  Sitting on the rooftop, sipping coffee, allowed  time for Kait and I to share about what God has been up to in our lives. We spent a lot of time talking and following a daily devotional.  It was a time when I really needed a friend to share my thoughts, frustrations and fears. It was a time of reflection on what amazing things God has done.  Just a few days before Kait left, she approached me with some more of her thoughts.  She was processing a lot and was thinking of coming back.  And after a lot of prayer and patience, God opened doors for Kait to join the ministry here in Guatemala for the next three months.  I think at one point Kait skyped with us and told  us it would really take a miracle for this to happen.  Once the decision was made, God opened door after door  just like He did for us not too long ago.  I really encourage you to check out her story at  Should I Stay, Or Should I Go?  Needless to say, we were thrilled!  We welcomed Kait back this past week and love having the extra company!  It will be a full house for the next little while as Matt's parents arrive in a week.  There is a lighter mood in the kids and I know that they welcome friends and family from back home.  It is an amazing feeling being able to share what we are so passionate about and for people to come and see for themselves.

Making 250 oliebollen

There are times I look around and question so much and wonder why.....and there are many days I feel like I am spinning my wheels.  There are so many more times of feeling frustrated  but all it takes is one good moment.... a hug from one of the girls, a conversation, helping someone, and it goes away just like that.  One of those moments happened just yesterday.  It is not uncommon for people to come to our door and ask for money.  We have been very careful not to just hand out money to anyone, for many reasons.  This past week, as I was doing my devotions, I felt the Lord speak to my spirit.  He asked me that when the next person came needing money that I was suppose to give.  That was it...just give.  So sure enough, a man came knocking and was looking for money. Matt went out to talk to him. His baby boy needed a shunt in his head and he had documentation from a doctor as evidence.  Without my knowing, Matt gave what he felt he should.  I later shared what I felt God was impressing on my heart.  Sometimes walking in obedience doesn't make sense to us.  Sometimes we don't always understand or agree on the things that are needed.  I knew what God had asked me and without knowing, Matt gave.  Praise God!

Oliebollen

Girls helping make the New Year Eve treats!

Meet Max

Max with Eddie's son Oscar

Max posing with Louis and Eddie with their new hens

     Max is the oldest of our three children.  I love watching him develop into a independent, responsible young man.  His love for people and kindness is shown in every relationship he makes.  He is a gentle and sensitive soul.  Upon arriving here in Guatemala, Max decided he wanted to  raise chickens.  Farming is of great interest and Max's curiosity in raising animals has been a passion for awhile.  He is currently reading "Organic Farming" as a bed-time story. I think that says enough:) 

    Once we got settled into our home here,  the boys started planning and constructing a chicken coop.  Max decided he was going to raise meat chickens and once they were ready for butchering, we would donate the birds to Casa Hogar, thus providing some additional meat for their diet.  Leading up to Christmas, Max decided to package up two boxes containing 10 laying hens each for the two employees of Casa Hogar, Eddie and Louis.  Eddie and his wife and their four children live across the road from the orphanage (as seen in the photos below).  Loius and his new wife of just a month live down the road.  We were excited to be able to bless these families with what seems so small and insignificant in our minds yet so huge for them.

    Every 3 weeks, Max purchases a new batch of chicks and raises them until its time to butcher them.   The first round was a tough one for Max as he got attached to his "pets".  We reminded him of the great importance of his job  and that he could chose one out of the batch for a pet.  A couple days before Christmas, Matt, Max and Gabe, killed and de-feathered 16 chickens along with the girls at Casa Hogar that would be later used for their traditional tamales.  Without any reminders, Max is outside first thing in the morning taking his job seriously.  We are very proud of you Max!  Keep up the great work!

Progress!!!

After a couple months in Guatemala some feelings of accomplishment are starting to happen.  With the little Spanish training we have had so far, Mandy and I are beginning to become more independent throughout the town.  Thanks to our numerous friends in Guatemala we can practice lots.  Special thanks to our Spanish teacher Walter for being patient in getting us to understand more.  Due to everyone's efforts we can have basic conversations; our friends that speak English are now speaking more Spanglish with us; we can read basic instructions; and now we can understand the main idea of what our pastor is talking about.  Still very far from being fluent, but happy with our results this far.

Cooking 100 crepes with one frying pan!!!

This week Mandy started to teach the younger nuns how to prepare different cheap quick meals not commonly eaten here (French toast, and crepes with fruit).  It is exciting to watch eight nuns gather around a frying pan just to learn simple technique.  Even some of the nuns badger Mandy and I to be their English teacher which provides entertainment for both parties.

Earlier this week I joined a gym in town because the diet down here is beginning to 'grow' on me.  Mandy and I have been getting more brave to venture out of house more independently so we can exercise and get a small break from our home.  People have been friendly to us as we going about our work outs.   However Mandy seems to get too much attention from the men down here which sometimes hinders that positive endorphin feeling.

Chickens fattening up.

Max has been doing an excellent job raising chickens in our backyard.  In another couple of weeks this batch will go to the chopping block.  All chickens Max takes care of are for food at Casa Hogar.  Our plan is that every two to three weeks we will have a batch of 20-24 chickens for Casa Hogar which will increase the amount and quality of meat in their diet.  Fun project for Max and a benefit to Casa Hogar.

While we plug away at small projects, Mandy and I have made it our goal to connect well with all groups that come and support Casa Hogar.  This week I had the pleasure of sitting down with a husband and wife team that organizes a large medical group that comes down from the Chicago area.  This couple pays for English classes to be delivered at Casa Hogar and for materials for other trade courses taught on site.  In our meeting they were interested in our service project at Casa Hogar and they made me responsible for the direction of the English program at Casa Hogar.  Their desire is to have me report to them the success and effectiveness of the program, which had not been done before for the past couple of years.  Aside from this excellent connection I had the opportunity to meet the mayor of Jalapa, the medical director of the state of Jalapa, the hospital director, and the agricultural minister of Jalapa.  What a great opportunity to get to know those people who have so much influence in Jalapa.

Ultimately, this week opened the door to discuss with Mother Claudia that a central plan is needed for all of the aid groups to feed off of instead of coming up with their own plans.  Mother Claudia agreed that we could work together in making this one plan and use it to coordinate future aid.  Planning ahead is not common down here so this was a massive break through.  I am truly looking forward to see what can be planned.