Do you ever wonder if you are doing the right thing?

Mercedes teaching the toddlers
at the safe house a new game.

When we first got started on this whole missionary life back in 2009, we have often struggled with where we need to be.  So many opportunities come our way each day, many of which are small with no lasting impact but on the rare occasion we face big ones.  For Mandy and I, coming to Guatemala was a three year process in which we fought about where our purpose was in God's plan for us and our children.  Through lots of prayer and discernment, we feel that we are supposed to be here and working with these awesome yet unwanted children.

 I personally struggle  playing my own devil's advocate.  Unquestionably, I feel that working in Guatemala is our calling but what that work entails is not always so clear.  Many days I pray to be productive or to find the right combination of 'works' to 'relationship'.  What provides a better eternal impact?  Giving to those in need? Being with those in need? Both?

Taking on five girls full time in our home has
presented some challenges (to say the least).

How does someone wade through all of the problems in the world and find one that they need to "fix" when so many problems are presented?  For example, the children at the safe house need decent food, shelter, water, and a spiritual education.  All of which we have been providing.  However, some are learning English in school and need some support, babies need to be given more attention, some kids have speech therapy appointments, others want to learn how to craft, all of them need to get exercise and time out of the house, they need spiritual mentors, etc.  Realistically I know we can't be all things to all people.  Mandy and I are pulled in different directions to do what is 'best' for our family.  Admittedly, we have made many mistakes and have questioned ourselves in the decision making process.

My parents with Gabe and Mercedes ready
to do some trick or treating.

To answer the blog title, I do not always think we are doing the right thing, but we do strive to do the best at what we can.  I remember a conversation with my parents a couple years back while we were getting ready to go out for Halloween.  Mom and Dad made a decision when I was about nine years old to stop going out for Halloween.  Talk about torture, watching your friends enjoy the evening of collecting candy while we went to the mall to avoid the costumed kids knocking at our door.  However, 24 years later my parents got dressed up at my house with my kids and went out to enjoy the evening of collecting treats.  During that night, I jabbed at my parents that they had denied me a right of passage as a kid and here they are celebrating the holiday with my own.  To which my Dad replied quickly and confidently that they were wrong and at times parents make mistakes.  Nothing more than that.  For me, my Dad demonstrated a lot of grace.  He was not going beat himself up but stated where his decision wasn't the best and moved on.

I am thankful for the example my parents provided for me.  With the various projects that we have completed here and the people that we have interacted with, we struggle to always see the benefit we hope to create.  Where we need to be gracious with ourselves,  is that our hearts are always in the best interest of those we work with.  Continue to pray for us and those we work with as we desire to make positive and eternal change by doing the right thing.

An Amazing Start

     Many of you are aware that I am (was) a school teacher and that I was working with the great staff and student body at Grapeview Public School.  Like any job, you connect with fellow staff and students by discussing your comings and goings to have a better sense of each other.  As the year progressed, many coworkers were intrigued with the work our family had done in Guatemala last year and they asked more about our journey.  It's flattering when  someone takes an interest in what you do.  Little did I know that after my  announcement to return to Guatemala, the school would start scheming ways to help.

Freezie sales for mission support.

     During the last month of school a group of girls in grades 4 and 5 devised a plan to use duct tape and fold it into all sorts of crazy assortments to make pencil flowers, hair bows, wallets, purses, and other items.  They sold these items around the school and directed all funds to the mission in Guatemala.  Additionally, two teachers started to sell freezies at school with their class and social justice club to direct all funds to the needs of the orphanage.  Another teacher  formed a drum group and performed at the local Home Hardware raising both awareness and financial support for the  mission.  I was blown away by all the support and that a group of people were sympathetic toward the same cause.

     The following week we had an assembly for volunteers that support our school community.  During the assembly they called me up and were making mention of the work my family and I have done and will be doing.  I prayed that God would give me the right words to say to the young audience as I can't go into the details about the harsh realities many children around the world experience and why they need so much help.  After I delivered a short speech (which I honestly thank God for because I am far from being that articulate!) the staff announced how much was raised and estimated how much more may be raised.  A large cheque of $2300 was unrolled.  My lower lip started to quiver and then the staff did something even more incredible.  They said  that more was being done.  A lump in my throat formed. Two retiring teachers  this year,  gave up their retirement gifts and directed the monies to the mission. As if that wasn't enough,  another teacher stated that the school had drafted a letter in honour of these retiring teachers that a donation from the Grapeview community could be made to our mission.  Tears filled my eyes.

Bucket Drumming at Home Hardware

     After dropping these bombs of amazing support they then asked me to pose with students and the cheque for a photo op.  I mustered up the words 'thank you' and 'wow' before I quickly turned away from the crowd and looked at my supportive staff and students and began to sob.  Crying is not a common event for me but has become more a part of how I express myself when God breaks me.  God broke me at that moment as I saw how much capacity of love exists in my school community.  I hugged each staff and student down the line that stood behind me not only during that presentation but in support for the work that was going to happen in Guatemala.  It is a rare moment to feel that loved by so many people at once and know that they too mourn over the unmet needs of others that we care deeply about.

     Needless to say the outpouring of support at Grapeview was an amazing start as we continue to find people to partner with us in the mission.  We pray that our support letters find you well and that you can be a part of a ministry.

Jeremiah 29:11

Progress!!!

After a couple months in Guatemala some feelings of accomplishment are starting to happen.  With the little Spanish training we have had so far, Mandy and I are beginning to become more independent throughout the town.  Thanks to our numerous friends in Guatemala we can practice lots.  Special thanks to our Spanish teacher Walter for being patient in getting us to understand more.  Due to everyone's efforts we can have basic conversations; our friends that speak English are now speaking more Spanglish with us; we can read basic instructions; and now we can understand the main idea of what our pastor is talking about.  Still very far from being fluent, but happy with our results this far.

Cooking 100 crepes with one frying pan!!!

This week Mandy started to teach the younger nuns how to prepare different cheap quick meals not commonly eaten here (French toast, and crepes with fruit).  It is exciting to watch eight nuns gather around a frying pan just to learn simple technique.  Even some of the nuns badger Mandy and I to be their English teacher which provides entertainment for both parties.

Earlier this week I joined a gym in town because the diet down here is beginning to 'grow' on me.  Mandy and I have been getting more brave to venture out of house more independently so we can exercise and get a small break from our home.  People have been friendly to us as we going about our work outs.   However Mandy seems to get too much attention from the men down here which sometimes hinders that positive endorphin feeling.

Chickens fattening up.

Max has been doing an excellent job raising chickens in our backyard.  In another couple of weeks this batch will go to the chopping block.  All chickens Max takes care of are for food at Casa Hogar.  Our plan is that every two to three weeks we will have a batch of 20-24 chickens for Casa Hogar which will increase the amount and quality of meat in their diet.  Fun project for Max and a benefit to Casa Hogar.

While we plug away at small projects, Mandy and I have made it our goal to connect well with all groups that come and support Casa Hogar.  This week I had the pleasure of sitting down with a husband and wife team that organizes a large medical group that comes down from the Chicago area.  This couple pays for English classes to be delivered at Casa Hogar and for materials for other trade courses taught on site.  In our meeting they were interested in our service project at Casa Hogar and they made me responsible for the direction of the English program at Casa Hogar.  Their desire is to have me report to them the success and effectiveness of the program, which had not been done before for the past couple of years.  Aside from this excellent connection I had the opportunity to meet the mayor of Jalapa, the medical director of the state of Jalapa, the hospital director, and the agricultural minister of Jalapa.  What a great opportunity to get to know those people who have so much influence in Jalapa.

Ultimately, this week opened the door to discuss with Mother Claudia that a central plan is needed for all of the aid groups to feed off of instead of coming up with their own plans.  Mother Claudia agreed that we could work together in making this one plan and use it to coordinate future aid.  Planning ahead is not common down here so this was a massive break through.  I am truly looking forward to see what can be planned.

The Power of Children

It is amazing during this time of building support for our mission this coming fall who surprisingly steps up to the plate to help out.  Over this past month we have had children from grade 6 and under in our community show up to our house with donations to help the girls we so love in Casa Hogar.  In total between 8 children they have raised close to $600.  I know when I was that age the idea of helping someone off in a distant land didn't cross my mind.  It simply amazes me that these kids have forgone birthday presents, spending time playing, and/or buying something of their own interest to ensure that a just act can be done for those they don't even know.
Two of these children held a birthday party and through their own decisions came to the conclusion that another gift is meaningless compared to the value of investing in others, so donations from the partygoers to our mission was what they opted for instead.
Another of these kids took it on himself to go door to door in his neighbourhood with our brochure and talked to these people about our mission to raise support.  Pretty brave act in my book since I am not the type to be overly comfortable in a "sales" situation.
Often I am humbled by the noble and faithful acts of children.  As an adult, I often do risk analysis to many situations in my life and sometimes fail to act on things because of the unknown.  How many of us are skeptical of how our donations are being spent?  It is within good reason and prudent to find out what is being done with the money God provided for you.  We all have heard how some organizations fail to exercise effective use of monies.  However is this true for most?
After meeting a series of people in missions work I have witnessed more often than not the dedication and (as some may call it) sacrifice these people endure to ensure the betterment of others.  An example of this is my former gym teacher in high school.  He has travelled to Zambia for the last few years to develop communities over there that are in need of aid through basic housing, infrastructure and education.  His devotion to the cause and development of the mission caused him to set the goal of raising $30 000 per year for aid services for the next five years.  It has now ballooned to $500 000 in total donations received within the same time period.  The staff is completely volunteer and no cost is ever directed to covering the expenses of these volunteers when they do the short term missions.  This and many other stories exist out there of people's dedication making it possible for those donating to see God's money being used to the greatest extent.
As Mandy and I continue down this faith journey we often need to pause and have that child like faith that this too will work out.  It is not to say that planning and strategizing how we are doing this is being thrown out, but to believe that God has people in mind for us to give us support and that He will be abundant in providing for us is what we lie heavily on now.  Our prayers are that people see us as effective stewards of what God has entrusted with so far in our lives.
In the meantime, work must carry on and trust that this will work for the glory of God.

Matt