every now and then it's good to let it out

Well today made for an interesting one.  I woke up this morning and busied myself in the kitchen preparing chocolate cake for 30 inmates.  Our prison 
bible study invited our family in for lunch. We felt honoured knowing how difficult it is for them to afford such a gesture.  They went all out and made chicken ( feet included) with potatoes and rice.  At one point Mercedes needed to use their facilities.  I was apprehensive but they insisted on showing us the bathroom.  The toilet was next to the stove top burner.  I think I threw up a little in my mouth seeing where the food had been prepared.  Sometimes it is better NOT to know.  Since the area is very small and at times it feels like the walls are closing in, they set up tables  in the only open available area.  Directly over the sewage drain.  Sweet little Mercedes, leaned in and whispered, "mom, something smells funny".   I reminded her to be a little gracious and told her that not many 6 year olds get the opportunity to eat lunch in a prison in a developing country, so just go with it.  Needless to say the kids did their best at the meal and looked very happy when I pulled out the chocolate cake.  For one lady, I know our visit means the world to her as she has had no one come to see her.  She hugged me and told me she loved me.  The very first bible study morning I brought in soaps/shampoo and t-shirts.  This particular lady makes sure she has that t-shirt on every Tuesday.  So precious!

The kids needed some down time with mom, so we hung out at home and the boys worked on their school project while Matt and Jay went out shooting film in Los Pinos.   Just as they were finishing up interviewing a handful of girls, a mom with her five kids showed up at the gate.  The youngest, being four months but looking like a two month, was very dehydrated and needed medical care urgently.  Leaving the other four behind, the mom (along with a nun)  got a ride into town with Matt.  He drove them straight to the hospital.   Just a couple hours later we received a call from Mother Claudia, asking us to pick them up and return them to Casa Hogar.  Since Matt is constantly bombing back and forth, I offered to do the drive.  When I arrived at the hospital, only the nun holding the baby hopped in the truck.  She shut the truck door and left the mother standing on the street corner.  I felt confused and waited  for her.  The nun looked at me and said she can't look after her children.  Of course I knew where this was heading but I still had so many questions.  I had a very hard time driving away.  I can't imagine what the mom was feeling.  This particular situation is sadly far too common here.  The father left his wife and their 5 children and she had no more to give.  Not enough food or resources to provide for her children. Out of desperation, she landed at the gates of Casa Hogar for help.  I have been exposed to so many difficulties and seen a lot of poverty.  In some ways it becomes 'normal" to see kids picking through the garbage every morning, or an 80 year old woman hauling wood or water, or kids my daughters age selling candy in the streets to help make a living for their families.  I don't want to become de-sensitized and accept it but I guess I already have.  Some things I will never understand.  I sometimes am disconnected or maybe guard my emotions, because if I didn't I would be weeping all the time.  Every now and then it's good to let it out. Tonight in the truck, the tears streamed down my cheeks.  I felt such a sadness and emptiness for this mom.  I know that this decision probably was not an easy one and that it is in the children's best interest, but it I couldn't imagine the pain.

A Real Gift!

I feel like I have been out of touch for awhile.  So much to catch up on that I feel my mind is spinning.  We welcomed our friend Kait last Monday.  Her visit is very timely.  Leading up to her arrival, I was feeling really down and missing family and friends back home.  With the holiday season and family gatherings, I felt a little homesick.  Having a familiar face and someone to share our life with here has been really encouraging and  a breath of fresh air.
We carried out a tradition we started last year with the help of Kait.  Last night we prepared a dinner for the nuns of Casa Hogar.  Going to buy all the supplies was a chore in itself.  It's not like going to the Super Store and picking up everything at once.  The nuns giggled with delight as the boys escorted them  to their seat.  It was so awesome serving them as they chatted over a candle lit dinner.  We shared with them after how we respect what they do and how we appreciate the life they are dedicating to serving the girls.
Kait and I spent an afternoon with the nuns making angels and snowflakes and decorated the cafeteria.  It always amazes me how the simple things can bring so much joy.
It's not all work and no play when we have special visitors.  Along with other missionary friends, we went to "Pino Dulce" (means Sweet Pines) for a hike through the mountains and picnic lunch.  We hoped the fog would clear so we could experience the  view while we zip-lined.  We literally were up among the clouds.  It was AWESOME!!!!!! I felt silly that I was more afraid than my six year old daughter.  God has given her a free spirit and one of no fear.
On  our way home  we stopped in at a local friend who lives with his entire family up in the mountains.  They generously invited us into their home that consisted of not much more than a few plastic stools and a table.  In the corner stood a small plastic christmas tree.  It was so cute how proud of it they were after they plugged it in.  That experience was hard for me.  I looked around and tried not to look utterly shocked at the way people live.  Dirt floors, big open gaps near the roof, mud and brick walls,  chickens running in and out......With the nights being especially cold this time of year, I couldn't imagine how they keep warm.  This christmas season has been a very unique experience.  I know we talk a lot about having too much and cutting back on spending, but how much changes for us.  For Matt and I, this has become a reality this year.  Trust me, I often think back on what I would be doing back home now.  Probably would have filled my freezer with so many baked goods, I wouldn't know what to do with.  My house would have been all decked out for christmas, and I would have  joined the commercial rat race of finding all those gifts. If you ask me if I am missing out on things, I would have to say absolutely not.  I am finding joy in the little ( yet very big things for us)  Going back to Emmanuel's family, I would have to say the same.  They have each other.  Nothing fancy....just simple.  Really if we reflect on how Christ entered this world, it was simple.  Jesus' whole ministry was about investing in people, not things.   We visited with this family that afternoon and had the privilege of spending time getting to know them.  During our visit, they offered us coffee that they grow on their property,  and then sent us on our way with bananas and a chicken.  Here is a family who has so little yet so much to give.  They wanted to bless us.

Sometimes it's hard to receive a gift like that.  We were humbled and thankful.  Speaking of being humbled and blessed, our paster surprised us and took us out to a ranch for lunch and later on to his farm to cut a tree down.  I had mentioned how I have always wanted to cut down a christmas tree.  Apparently this is a HUGE deal in Guatemala and they have laws against cutting trees down.  In order to cut one down you need a special permit, which of course cost money.  Last Saturday, Paster Ed and his family took us out to visit his father's  farm in the mountains.  It was AMAZING!   We hiked out to find the perfect tree.  All I have to say is that it looked a lot smaller on the side of that mountain.  We came home and still had some trimming to do.  Again, words could not describe my joy and thankfulness.  I always have a hard time excepting gifts....I sometimes feel like I owe or need to repay the favour.  God's gift to us comes with no strings attached.  We didn't earn His love and nothing we can do or don't do will make Him love us less.  And I guess in a way that is a gift I can pass on this christmas.  The gift of Jesus' love!

Progress!!!

After a couple months in Guatemala some feelings of accomplishment are starting to happen.  With the little Spanish training we have had so far, Mandy and I are beginning to become more independent throughout the town.  Thanks to our numerous friends in Guatemala we can practice lots.  Special thanks to our Spanish teacher Walter for being patient in getting us to understand more.  Due to everyone's efforts we can have basic conversations; our friends that speak English are now speaking more Spanglish with us; we can read basic instructions; and now we can understand the main idea of what our pastor is talking about.  Still very far from being fluent, but happy with our results this far.

Cooking 100 crepes with one frying pan!!!

This week Mandy started to teach the younger nuns how to prepare different cheap quick meals not commonly eaten here (French toast, and crepes with fruit).  It is exciting to watch eight nuns gather around a frying pan just to learn simple technique.  Even some of the nuns badger Mandy and I to be their English teacher which provides entertainment for both parties.

Earlier this week I joined a gym in town because the diet down here is beginning to 'grow' on me.  Mandy and I have been getting more brave to venture out of house more independently so we can exercise and get a small break from our home.  People have been friendly to us as we going about our work outs.   However Mandy seems to get too much attention from the men down here which sometimes hinders that positive endorphin feeling.

Chickens fattening up.

Max has been doing an excellent job raising chickens in our backyard.  In another couple of weeks this batch will go to the chopping block.  All chickens Max takes care of are for food at Casa Hogar.  Our plan is that every two to three weeks we will have a batch of 20-24 chickens for Casa Hogar which will increase the amount and quality of meat in their diet.  Fun project for Max and a benefit to Casa Hogar.

While we plug away at small projects, Mandy and I have made it our goal to connect well with all groups that come and support Casa Hogar.  This week I had the pleasure of sitting down with a husband and wife team that organizes a large medical group that comes down from the Chicago area.  This couple pays for English classes to be delivered at Casa Hogar and for materials for other trade courses taught on site.  In our meeting they were interested in our service project at Casa Hogar and they made me responsible for the direction of the English program at Casa Hogar.  Their desire is to have me report to them the success and effectiveness of the program, which had not been done before for the past couple of years.  Aside from this excellent connection I had the opportunity to meet the mayor of Jalapa, the medical director of the state of Jalapa, the hospital director, and the agricultural minister of Jalapa.  What a great opportunity to get to know those people who have so much influence in Jalapa.

Ultimately, this week opened the door to discuss with Mother Claudia that a central plan is needed for all of the aid groups to feed off of instead of coming up with their own plans.  Mother Claudia agreed that we could work together in making this one plan and use it to coordinate future aid.  Planning ahead is not common down here so this was a massive break through.  I am truly looking forward to see what can be planned.